Tonight we had Back to School Night at the Middle School, and, as I'd hoped, "His Musical Hotness" was there.
What is it about being around him that makes me revert to my junior high self? With everyone else I was smiling, talkative, etc. With him, I couldn't do it. The liquid electricity that shoots through me in those moments has some kind of paralyzing effect. Of course, I greeted him when I walked in, but beyond that, no small talk.
The principal was going to put us at a table together to meet and greet the parents, but at the last minute decided I should have my own table and moved my little sign. He jokingly said, "Oh, I've been abandoned." lol.
There were a few caught glances, but otherwise, nothing. Honestly, it's not that I want "something." I just want to get over my junior high-ness and be able to talk to the guy. Ask him how his first year is going so far, just chit chat. But I haven't even been able to do that. And I don't see him very often. We both work at the middle school but our paths rarely cross since I'm going back and forth between middle and elementary and he's always in the Performing Arts Building unless he comes to the MS building to check his box or whatever.
I feel sort of girlish and immature talking (blogging, whatever) about him the way that I do, but he really does seem like a genuinely good guy. He's cute, yes. But from how I've seen him interact with people, he's more than just a handsome face. I would be okay if he were cute and shallow. But he's cute with substance. (From what I can tell so far, anyway.) And that's what makes it worse.
4 comments:
UGH! It's killing me just reading the whole ordeal. I'm sitting here in my classroom thinking...I knokw that feeling!
It's aggrevating b/c you know that you are ok with being by yourself, single, etc. However you meet some mysterious guy and you can't help but think what it would be like. Then you act all stupid while trying to maintain you're "I'm ok" attitude. What a mess! Ugh...guys!
WWJD - that's what I say or better yet since I believe I have the mind of God and I'm Christ-minded as God would say - - > "Don't let me come down there... (to that school), hey that's a good idea (wink)
I love it!...."His Musical Hotness" *smile* Gosh, but I know how you feel, Chantelle. I mean, I may be a 20-year married person, but I still well-remember those single days and the agony and torture of wondering and not knowing. I wish there were some easy answers but being an apostolic single is....simply put.....difficult, to say the least.
In highschool, when I liked someone new, I would draw a box on a sheet of notebook paper. I would title the box "How many times ____ has looked at me." I would tally how many times he looked at me, adding little notes when he smiled. So don't feel bad, crushes are kind of senselessly fun.
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