Crybaby

Whoever (in JAY-sus name) dares to meet the challenge of being with me 'till death do us part will have to be able to withstand a weeping woman. Good Lord, I don't know if I know anyone who cries as much as I do.

At least this time, I wasn't in an abysmal abyss, crying tears of existential anguish. Today they were angry tears. Oh, but it felt so good to get it all out.

In other news, I finished my stories. ::curtsies:: Thank you, thank you.

Now, I shall feast on such healthy things as chips and dip and miniature Twix bars while my still fast metabolism does what it does. Ain't nothin in this world a good cry and some junk food can't help.

Let me go ahead and get my procrastinating out of the way.

1. Tornado. Good God. When I woke up the next morning and looked at pictures of Tuscaloosa . . . a city I lived in for a good 5 years, it was heartrending. 15th Street, just gone. Thankfully, family and I are fine (and thanks to those who sent inquiries of concern), but there are a few others we know of in other cities who aren't.

2. Almost done with stories. Gotta finish these bad boys this weekend. And then that's going to be it for a while. I've got to get my life together before the big move.

3. This morning I did a little cultural activity at a local junior high. Brought some paella, pictures, Mexican sombrero, castanets, etc. The kids seemed to enjoy it.

4. God, help me endure. My learning center gig is wearing out my brain's welcome. Because of my genius move of quitting the best paying job I'd ever had in the middle of the year, I have to work this summer. (Can I stop sounding so spoiled and just be glad I have a job? Sheesh.)

5. There is a bespectacled man in here with a t-shirt on that has a picture of some muppets dressed gangsta-style. It gives him zero street cred or respect. And he has it tucked into some dusty black jeans. Boo.

6. Lady sitting next to me out of the blue starts involved emotional convo about the tornado. I gave her some kleenex.

7. And after chatting about other stuff, I told her I had to get back to work. So I have to be a woman of my word.

Last Saturday

I had a face painting spot upon a spread out blanket at a park. We had an Easter egg hunt outreach at a subdivision not far from from our church.

A little two-braided girl wanted her face painted.

"What would you like me to paint?"

"What've you got? What are my choices?"

"Anything you can imagine."

"Woooowww."

A Sunday School Story in Real Life

Scripture reference: Matt 22:39 "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself."

A young lady walks into Wal-Mart with the purpose of getting cupcakes for the Sunday School kids early Easter morning. As she gets in line to pay, an elderly lady ahead of her dressed in all her Easter finery turns around and asks the young lady where she got the cupcakes from.

"Over there in the bakery section." The young lady pointed in the general direction.

"Oh, I don't know if I like these cookies I have here. I think I might like some of those instead."

"Well, you can have as many of the ones I have as you like--I have five of them--and I'll go back over and get some more. Do you want some? How many of them?"

"You'd do that for me? Bless you! I'll take three of them."

"No problem. Do you want me to put these cookies back?"

"You gonna be blessed today."

The young lady smiles and puts the cookies back on the way to get a few more containers of mini-cupcakes. She wasn't really trying to be a do-gooder, she just didn't like the idea of the poor old lady all nice and dressed up to have to get out of line and walk all the way over to the bakery section to get some cupcakes.

When the young lady came back, she planned to get at the end of the line like normal, but there was a couple which was originally behind her who must've overheard the exchange and called her to come back up to her spot behind the old lady. Then the old lady, in front of her, finishing her purchase, told the young lady she would bestow her Wal-Mart senior discount on the young lady's purchase.

The young lady was surprised and pleased. She gave the old lady a hug and wished her a Happy Easter.

The moral of the story: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Willie the Shake

That's what my uber-nerdy Creative Writing instructor in undergrad (on whom, inevitably, I had a super crush) called William Shakespeare.

Well, today's the bard's birthday. He would have been 447. And what better way to celebrate than to go to the Alabama Shakespeare Festival to see my all-time favorite Shakespearean play, Julius Caesar, with my little bro. I convinced him to dress up, which is no mean feat:

And the play was fabulous. We got to yell along with the plebeians. "Caesar, Caesar!" "We will be satisfied! Let us be satisfied!" "We'll mutiny!"

Happy Birthday, Will. If this be error and upon me proved, I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Today I

1. got up super early to give a presentation to another local Rotary club about my French experience. Brought back SO many memories.

2. discovered that my sunbabies need an intervention:

The leaves are starting to yellow and droop. No, babies! Mommy's gonna plant you in a better place, don't worry.

3. took a look at the contract for my on campus apartment whose lease begins August 10. I guess now I have a specific answer for "So, when are you moving?"

4. made good progress on my latest installment of Sunday School stories.

5. got the awesomest Easter basket ever:

My Sunbabies Again

My little guys are really growing up. Compare the pictures from last week to today:

I love you, sunbabies. One day you're going to have big fat sunflower blooms. Just keep drinking your water and soaking in your sunshine like good little sunbabies. Mommy loves you!

And I dunno if anyone reading this has any gardening expertise (cuz I sho'ly don't), but as you can see, right now, they're in a planter. Will they be okay left in there? Should I somehow transplant them into the ground? If I do, will they be okay?

Ensconced

Ensconced again at my favorite haven of procrastination.

I'm in a corner, in a plush chair. Away from the coffee grinder, the chatterers, the gray skies outside.

Right now, I exist in my own world and am not resisting the urge to plunge deliciously into it.

For the people who like to snap me out of it when I stare out into space: True, I'm not in the present. I'm in the romanticized past. I'm in the imagined future. Or in the hurtful past. Or the feared future.

What I wonder: What is out there? What is really out there? I thought I'd already been out there, but I wake up every day realizing more and more that I've only scratched the surface.

What I remember is on my desk: A Spanish-English dictionary. A French-English dictionary. Two volumes of World Literature. A cylindrical can with sunflowers painted on it which holds a basket of artificial sunflowers. A small bottle of superglue. Two postcards with the same black and white photo of a young Langston Hughes. A still-unopened heart-shaped box of chocolates from Valentine's Day.

A man once said to me, "You already know I can't be what you need. But what do you want?"

I remember the discomfort I felt being faced with a smiling girl in her mid-twenties with grimy, eaten-away teeth. She was not ashamed.

Sometimes I can still feel the aching loneliness I felt when I was in France. It was penetrating, like rain.

I'm amazed by the sheer pleasure I get in watching something grow. It's a miracle, a testament to a living God.

I'm comforted by a silly face my brother makes. He wrinkles his top lip and his cheeks take on a frog-like cast. He speaks in an exaggerated, almost hillbilly voice. What this really means is that no matter what, no matter how old we get, he will be my little brother.

When I went to pick up my shoes from the Chinese shoe repair place at the mall, I was pleased with how completely they restored the heels. "Better than original!" the owner beamed.

I smile at the relation between friends and well-being. When you can talk about stories and flower children with one friend, speak other languages with another friend, and laugh about awkward classroom dynamics with yet another friend, I think of all the different ways you can connect with other human beings and how the knowledge of them is connected to the knowledge of yourself.

Mother of All Living (revised 4/17/2011)

She had never been this close to the plum tree before.

A green-eyed, panther-like creature, a sable cat, had wound its way through her idyll. She caught glimpses of its smooth dark pelt as it slunk past a wall of tangled vines. This wasn't one of the usual creatures with which she'd frolic during her rounds about the Garden. It was exotic, unfamiliar, and it awakened in her a sense of curiosity unlike any she'd ever felt before. She was drawn by its subtle scent of jasmine and intrigued by its deliberate, stealthy gait. She had decided to follow.

She followed until the creature paused at a tree whose branches hung heavy with dark fruit. She'd eaten the fruit of all the other trees of the Garden save this one. She had been warned by Man never to touch it. But the creature fixed its emerald gaze upon her, silently beckoning her closer.

She inched forward, transfixed, her footprints in the rich, moist earth the only evidence of her advance. At last, she was close enough to touch this beguiling creature, but before she dared, it caressed her leg with its tail. Disarmed, she knelt down and began to stroke its blue-black fur. The smell of jasmine was intoxicating. She began to tire and sat on the ground, reclining against the trunk of the plum tree. Her lids drooped and she nearly fell asleep, but she was fully awakened by whispering in her ear. As the creature spoke, she could feel its warm breath lingering against her cheek.

"The Ancient One said not to eat of this tree, didn't He?" the creature purred, pawing a fallen plum. She faced the creature, arrested by its piercing green stare.

"He-He said not to eat of it or even touch it or else we'd die." As the words left her mouth, she scrambled up from leaning against the trunk. The cat laughed and began to circle her.

"You shall not die. What nonsense. The Ancient One knows that if you eat of this tree, your eyes will be opened and you will understand good and evil. Like a god."

Why would the Ancient One want to keep something so enlightening from her? After all, she had nearly fallen asleep against the trunk of the tree and she still lived. She plucked a single plum from the low-hanging branch right above her and examined it. She suddenly felt watched. She spun around to find Man peering from behind a nearby tree, observing the entire scene wordlessly. Why had Man not tried to stop her? She felt the creature rub itself against her leg as it continued to circle her. She held up the plum. It was good for food, pleasant to the eye, and would allow her to see, to give her a knowledge she'd never possessed.

She bit in. Juice dribbled down her chin. It was sweet. Heady. Exhilarant. She did not die. She held it out towards Man.

My Sunbabies Are Growing Up!

Hey, my little sunbabies . . . c'mere, give Mommy some kisses. You're growing up, yes you are! If you drink all your water and soak in all your sunshine, you're gonna be big sunflowers one day, yes you will! Ooh, Mommy loves you loves you loves you! Mmmuah!

Booklove

Two Slate essays about two of my favorite things—books and falling in love:

Love in Bookstores

Judging a Girl by Her Cover

Enjoy!

New 'Do + Sunbabies

New 'Do
Curlicues! The sun will come oooout tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar that tomorroooooow, there'll be sun! Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love ya, tomorrow. It's only a day away! Now all I need are some patent-leather shoes with little buckles on the side. I can tap dance, too.

Sunbabies

My sunbabies are my future little pride and joy. I love sunflowers. With a passion. So I decided to grow some in the backyard. They're gonna be my little babies. I planted them today. I'm going to water them and make sure they get lots of sunlight and give them little bits of sunbaby num nums. I wuv you wittle sunbeebees. Mommy's gonna take gooood care of you.