Letter to B+

Dear B+,

I don't get you.  No, seriously, I don't get grades like you.  Last semester you thought you were being slick by showing up on a response paper.  You know, it didn't count for that much of my final grade, you thought maybe I wouldn't notice or that I wouldn't care as much.  Oh, I noticed all right, and I certainly did care.  I just didn't say anything.  Not to you, anyway.

But now, this semester, you've gone too far.  This time you had the brazen audacity to show up on a midterm!  A midterm!  Naw, son.  Am I going to have to file a restraining order against your behind?

How else can I express to you that you are NOT WELCOME on my papers?  What, you think because you have a "plus" attached that I should be cool with you?  Psshh!  You're still a B.  And I don't get Bs.  That plus don't change a thing.  Get ya head right, B+!  You are NOT the business, you are mad unattractive, there is nothing about you that would make me want you, and there is nothing you can do to change my mind.  Stay AWAY from my papers.

I seriously can't stand you.  What made you think that appearing on a midterm was going to endear you to me? Get outta my life. You are rebuked from ever entering my lifespace ever again.  Go bother someone else who thinks your "plus" schtick is cute.  There are plenty of students out there who would gladly have you, I'm sure.

But not me, honey.  My standards are pretty high.  Call me picky, but there you have it.  It doesn't take that much more effort to transform into at least an A-, if my papers are what you think you want.  Come back as an A of any variety, and then we can talk.  Otherwise, stay the heck away.

Sincerely,

Me