Moments

Sometimes missing the bus isn't that bad
Fantastic. As soon as the bus stop is in sight, the bus pulls away.  Then I have to wait another . . . oh, wait here's a city bus.  That wasn't too long of an extra wait.  I step on, swipe my card, and who do I see with an empty seat beside him and a smile?  The handsome Brazilian.  We chat, we get off a stop earlier to take a lovely walk and get some exercise.  In a charming accent: "Thank you for taking a walk with me."  So darn adorable.  If I had caught the bus I missed, I would've missed my little Brazilian excursion.  Sometimes we miss the bus we wanted to catch because there's a better bus already on the way.

Mortification in the produce section
After church, so I'm in a zebra print blouse (admittedly, a tad outside of my usual fare) a black skirt, a red belt and boots.  All I want are lettuce and tomatoes to make a salad to go along with my pasta.  But as soon as I round the corner, he spots me.  An old Southerner whose great-grandfather probably fought in the Confederate army, reduced to a stockboy at Kroger.  Old enough to be considered old, but young enough to not be senile and know better.  "I like them boots" was our introduction.  Me, thanking him sheepishly, just wanting a bag of pre-washed lettuce.  Then, LOUDLY, "Whoo-wee!  I like how you dress.  Good Lord, I'm bout to fall out over here! You looking real good.  Yo husband must take good care a you."  Me, stuck between flattered and utterly mortified, noticing the curious stares of passersby.  "Look!  Look over here at this gal!  Don't she look good?"  People actually looking.  And laughing.  Can I silently sink into the floor right now? "I'm sorry, but I'm not a shy man, ma'am."  Me, finally finding a voice, "But I am."  A million apologies, and I finally grab my bag of lettuce and get out of there, praying that I don't run into him again before I make it to the check-out line.  "Guess you better be careful bout what you wear to the grocery store next time," calls out one of the amused passersby as I was on my way to get a packet of garlic alfredo sauce mix.  Can I die right now?  Bam.  My worst fear realized.  He caught me again.  "Boy, I tell you, you could be a model.  Are you sure you ain't a movie star?"  Then he gets just a little too close for comfort, looks me right in the eye and reassures me, "You gonna be all right, girl.  You gonna be all right." And then walks away.  Um, thanks?  Did I appear as if I thought I wasn't going to be all right?  Note to self: NEVER go to that Kroger on a Sunday afternoon ever again.

She already knew what I was going to ask
Shopping at The Gap with a Chinese friend on Black Friday.  The way we became friends was quite simple, yet amusing.  In Auburn, coming home from a night of studying.  We crossed paths.  She introduced herself with the perkiness of an 8-year-old on a sugar high.  "Hi!  I have been in the United States for 40 days!" she said, proudly.  How can you deny friendship to someone like that?  Back to The Gap.  Surrounded by a gaggle of Asian kids, speaking unintelligibly (to me).  I wondered if she understood them.  I wonder if they're Chinese, too.  All I did was look at her and she said, "They are not Chinese."

Nerddom at its awkwardest
I decide to write my final paper on this art housey Argentine movie.  Not a whole lot of scholarly criticism about it, but I put my searching skills to work and rustled up an article written about it in 2011!  A rush of nerd juice to the head.  I spotted my professor in the hall and asked her if she was familiar with it.  Sure, I'll scan a copy of it for you right away.  Got my teacher's pet on, scanned the article, sent it to her, she posted it on eLC.  I didn't actually read it.  I scanned through it, though.  It was enough that it was recent and about the movie, right?  Wrong.  In class the next day.  Professor: "Did any of you read the article I posted?"  Student: "Yes, and you were cited in it, weren't you?" (Me in my head: Wait, she was? Flips to bibliography.  Bam.) Professor: "Yes, honestly, I was a little embarrassed about it because the article writer criticized me for not blah, blah, blah."  (Me in my head: Oh, snap. And I recommended it!  Awkwarrrd!) I might as well have said, "Hey, Dr. Such and Such, wanna read this article that lambastes your work?  I'll scan it for you right now!"  Note to self: READ articles in their entirety and check that bibliography right quick before that nerd rush to the head incites you to share it prematurely.  Geez.