Why is it that one minute a really awesome thing like winning a 6 month scholarship to study in a foreign country happens that sends you to cloud 9, and the next minute, the most frustrating situation in the universe rears its head once again and sends you way, way down?
I am thankful for what God has done. I really am. He's done literal miracles in my life. But He also knows well that I didn't want to have to go through the emotional wringer again, and He's putting me through exactly what I begged Him not to put me through again in this area of my life, but this time it's even worse.
The last time, it was kind of like, I knew better. I was hoping against hope for the wrong reasons, and I blame myself. But this time, what have I done wrong? It almost feels like I've been set up or something. The stress is overwhelming, and stress is what I need the least of right now. And I can't even sit through class without tearing up? It's wretched.
I would ordinarily blame me, but I can't see where I went wrong this time. My human impulse is to blame Him.
2 comments:
i'm sorry. is there someone you'd like me to kick in the knee for you? (besides the almighty...that generally doesn't work)
Ugh...I feel your pain and I'm so sorry! I'll join in on the kickin' in the knee if need be!
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