Older Guy

Why I have been contemplating this lately, I cannot exactly say.

I have briefly touched on this in other entries, but now, I shall put forth my theory on what I think I might want, the pros, and then the cons.

What I Think I Might Want
I think I might want an older guy. I’m 24, so I’m talking a 30+ guy. All of the guys I have had any type of relationship with/attachment to/crush on/ fill in the blank with whatever you want/ has been older. From one year older to eight years older. If you include my professorial infatuations from my college days, well, the gap substantially widens. lol.

I do not believe I am ultra mature. There was a time when I really liked an older guy and I discovered that the feeling was mutual, but in the end, I couldn’t deal with him any more because he was serious and ready to settle down and I was flighty and immature. But I was 16. Now, I think I have reached the point where I’m more serious and ready to settle down.

I do feel, however, that I may be more suited to someone older because of my goals and interests. I do not mean to generalize, and perhaps I just haven’t gotten out enough, but it just seems like guys in my peer group are not quite as mature. They still talk about . . . videogames and stuff. They’re still trying to “find themselves.” I don’t mean to down them for that. In a way, I’m still trying to find myself too, but I feel that I have clarity about my goals in life and what it will take to accomplish them.

The Pros
I think the big pro is that the older guy would be more stable, emotionally and financially. By this time, I think he would have himself figured out, and would be sure of what he wanted. He probably wouldn’t be as apt to be impulsive and varying. He would probably also be more apt to be financially secure and stable. He probably would have established himself in a career by now and be concerned with investing his money in more lasting things rather than . . . the latest shoes, videogames, cell phones, cars he can barely afford, and other flashy gadgets, all of which are wrapped up in trying to be ‘cool.’ Stability and security are the key words.

Secondly, I kind of like the idea of being partnered with someone with more life experience. He could teach me things I don’t know, introduce me to things I’ve never experienced. He would be more likely to intellectually stimulate and engage me, and that is such a must. I don’t want him to be like, “Hemingway? Oh, yeah, I remember reading something in high school about how this old dude caught a big fish and died in the end. Hey, let’s play Halo!”

The Cons
The big con is that, well, he’s older. It might be cute when I’m 20 something and he’s 30 something, but what about 10 years down the road? When I’m still considered relatively young in my mid-30s and he’s entering his 50s? And kids. Will he be too tired and rusty to play and keep up with them? I would want him to teach them how to throw a football and catch a baseball and shoot hoops. Would his knees be arthritic by the time the boys were old enough to play some one-on-one? And connected to his age, it’s almost a certainty that I’d outlive him. Would I be prepared to lose someone earlier than I’d want to?

And like, what if I wanted to blast TobyMac and lip-synch while dancing around the house? Would he be turned off and think I was immature? I’ll admit, my taste in music is kind of different and he might not like it. Sometimes I get really giggly and laugh uncontrollably, and sometimes I get moody and cry uncontrollably. Would he tire of my girlish ways? Would he ever have fun going to an amusement park and riding roller coasters over and over and over? The cons definitely have some good points to think about.

In the End
I really don’t know. I always put forth these theories of mine very tentatively because I don’t have that much experience in order to say that I definitely know what I want. It’s just something I’ve been thinking about. And really, who knows? I might marry a guy who’s 45 (though I must admit, my pops would have a really hard time with me being with a guy only 5 years younger than he is.) or, I might come across this super mature 20-year-old who’s my dream come true (though I think I would find it hard to be with a guy the same age as my youngest bro. ::shudder::). I really don’t know.